The Only Guide You’ll Ever Need to Atlanta Coffee Shops

12195831_10206828437162546_5816458455207214883_nIt’s a Sunday afternoon, and you’re dying for an overpriced pour-over that you could have made at home at a third-wave coffee shop. Where do you go? Luckily for you, I have some (unsolicited) ideas, as a belated ode to National Coffee Day:*

  1. Chrome Yellow Trading Company— because it’s extra hipster. Beware, parking is at a premium. Unless you keep muttering a prayer for parking favor under your breath, you will end up parking on the street 5 blocks away, and come back with a ticket under your windshield. It also doubles as a paper goods shop, so you can spend your entire paycheck on aesthetic goods that you absolutely NEED. There are succluents a-plenty, too. Usually serves Stumptown, with rotating guest roasters.
  2. Chattahoochee Coffee Company (Westside, Riverside) — Because Westside sometimes is hipster. If you want to sip a nice pour-over while reading 10 pages of a book so you can document how rad your life is to Instagram by the Chattahoochee river, you should def head to Riverside. But if you want to go to a great coffee shop where you will never have to fret about parking nor a place to sit, and it’s the weekend, head to Westside. Serves Counter Culture.
  3. Taproom Coffee — because it’s hipster, and my pour-over just now was served in both a mug and in a sightglass contraption. Serves East Pole and guest roasters (right now, it’s Sunegros from Louisville).
  4. Land of a Thousand Hills (Roswell, Atlantic Station) — it’s not hipster, but I would get behind its mission any day. It empowers Rwandan farmers and gives them dignity. Drink coffee, do good — am I right? Serves Land of a Thousand Hills.
  5. Condensa Coffee (O4W, Downtown) — because it’s hipster, and there are so many succulents. Parking is at a premium, too. Hope that you can get a coveted spot in that tiny ass parking garage. Serves Counter Culture.
  6. Octane Coffee— because it’s hipster, and get it while you still can, until the Revelator empire changes its name for good. Be sure you know how to parallel park, or have a streak with finding parking spots, because the Westside location definitely does not have a plethora of parking, and I’m sure that the other locations are the same. You can always get a pour-over to go, so you can park in the 15-minute spot, though. Serves Octane.
  7. Brash Coffee— because it’s hipster and situated in a little box. I am impartial, though, because I often frequented the now-closed Brash in Chattanooga, and thought it served the most delicious coffee ever. Note, there is probably a 5% chance that you will find seating inside, so you probably want to either take it to go, drink it outside as you shop around Howell Mill, or stand awkwardly and drink your pour-over. Serves Brash.
  8. Revelator Coffee — because it’s hipster, albeit I have yet to forgive it for buying out the local goodness that is called Octane. Offers free parking in its parking garage, which is an incredible commodity when you consider that it is on Howell Mill. Serves Revelator.
  9. Hodgepodge Coffee House — because it’s hipster, and only the most particularest of folks dare to venture in. Also the place where my friends forced me to check my AP scores summer of 2013, and I learned that I did not fail AP Spanish, AP Spanish, nor AP Lit. I may even forgive them for serving Batdorf & Bronson…
  10. Inman Perk — because it’s hipster, and if you use ScoutMob, you can get a free medium coffee. I take this back: the coffee was disgusting, who am I kidding. But it is in Inman Park, so it should be good, right?
  11. Brother Moto — because it’s hipster. I honestly have not gone yet, but I love their Instagram, so I might as well have been already, ya? Plus, don’t you want to grab a good cup of pour-over in a shop that doubles as a motorcycle garage?
  12. The Read Shop (Vinings) — because it has a very aesthetic layout, as the shop doubles as a bookshop. While there is limited seating, your taste buds while thank you as you sit down to sip a Stumptown pour-over while reading the newest trendy book. Aka because it’s hipster.

These are all great and take my money and all, but the coffee shop I frequent the most these days?

Starbucks on Roswell Road and Mount Vernon. Why? Because it’s drive-thru and my body will hate me at 7:05 AM if I don’t shell out $3.50 for my grande Starbucks double-shot over ice before 9 hours in corporate America.

*note: If you want a real expert opinion on the perfect Atlantan coffee shop, this is not for you.
*note #2: remember to tip your baristas, even if you don’t realize how expensive your pour-over is until they ask you to leave a tip, because — come out — you knew it was going to be expensive when you came in, and they are literally the same as you, trying to pay rent and propose to their baes. So don’t be that douchebag.
*note #3: if you enjoyed my “guide”, please considering supporting my pour-over habits by buying me an overpriced, fresh bag of beans from any of these lovely stores.
*note #4: there is a myriad of options awaiting you at these coffee shops, not just pour-overs. But get a pour-over. Or a cortado. That works too. #dailycortado am I right? But get a pour-over.
*note #5: yes, I do realize I over-use the word hipster. First Amendment, and did you really think this was a real guide to Atlanta coffee shops? Get over yourself.

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